Hold your tongue-keep your friendships

Dear Royal Friends,     

Our friendships account for a big chunk our happiness currency.

We need to protect them from the damage we can do in a knee-jerk reaction to some perceived or real infraction.

Were you ever just about to indulge in some delightfully decadent dessert, when an inner voice whispered, “Ten minutes on the lips, ten years on the hips?”  Wouldn’t it be fabulous if we had a similar sound “bite” that would give us pause before we lashed out at a friend?  

Here’s one of my favorite sayings that packs more “pause” than a five-legged cat. It goes:  “Least said, soonest mended.”

I understand that sometimes we’re faced with a “straw that broke the camel’s back” moment and we’re mad at a whole bunch of stuff,  and we just want to blow.

Here’s the problem. The salvo might feel good for a moment, but…ten minutes on the lips, ten years on the hips.

“Least said soonest mended.” Try it next time you’re on the brink of ripping your friend a new one. Give yourself the grace of stepping back. Remember what’s at stake. It’s not  just the friendship; it’s also your happiness. 

You can always eat dessert later.

XOXOXO,

PRINCESS DIANE VON BRAINISFRIED

“LIVE YOUR ROYALLY HAPPY LIFE!™”

 

 

The Most French Girl Thing About French Girls

Dear Royal Friends,                                                                                              

I love being a bit like a French Girl. It gives a princess a certain air, a certain mystery, a certain feminine style with a powerful stance.  

There’s one aspect of being a bit like a French Girl that I’d like to suggest you adopt, because when I do it (and I do it every morning and throughout the day) it has a very uplifting effect on my spirits.  Can you guess what it is?  I’ll give you a hint: It’s one of The Most French Things about a French Girl.

When we think about what is The Most French Thing about French Girls, we might conjure up some cliche images like a jaunty girl in a beret, smiling as she pedals a bicycle with her long crusty baguette and a small round cheese wheel jostling around in the bicyle’s front basket along with a bottle of red. Perhaps she’s wearing a blue and white horizontally striped sweater. Or a striped something.  Possibly she’s sporting chin length fashionable hair.  Always fashionable hair.  But something would be missing from that scene.  What’s something you will never see on a French girl…but bet your bottom Euro, she’s always wearing ( besides pretty, sexy and pretty sexy undies?) 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

…..perfume! 

To illustrate how obsessed  French Girls are with their perfume, I recently went to a wedding in New York.  Seated next to me was a quasi-relative French Girl traveling from Paris who exuded a luxurious fragrant presence.  Yes, she had chin length hair. I asked her what fragrance she was wearing.  I figured she’s just gonna tell me, but no, she proceeds to Show & Tell me in the most astoundingly French Girl way.  

She opened her teeny weenie purse that was in the shape of a small orange.  More of a pouch than a purse, really. This purse looked large enough to hold maybe a driver’s license, a piece of bubble gum, and either a pencil stub or a tampon, but not both.   She  proceeded to pull out of this walnut of a thing, a full-sized bottle of Pamplelune by Guerlain. Not a sample, not a travel size, but a big, full size bottle.  I couldn’t have been more surprised  had she produced a full-sized rabbit. Wearing a beret. And a blue and white striped sweater.

Think about it. Perfume must have been so important to my relative, that she handicapped herself with a full, heavy bottle of the stuff, thereby displacing other important cargo…like say…her wallet and her phone!  But to a French Girl, it made perfect “sense.”  She’s French. I remembered how  a few years before the wedding this quasi relative  was visiting for another occasion. As she passed by the stairs in the house we were visiting, I breathed the trail of a beautiful scent just as deliciously divine as the one she wore at the wedding.  I also asked then what she was wearing. It was Prada’s Infusion d’Iris.   Her nose knows what she wears, and she takes shhhpritzing seriously. 

Another truly elegant and stylish French Girl friend of mine who, when I first met her,  always smelled like Caleche by Hermes. Years later she always smelled like 24 Faubourg by Hermes. She never didn’t smell great, just like my French relative.  

How do these French Girls do it? Waft around in their perfume clouds?

The secret is: “spray well and often.”  Have perfume will carry. None of this spray to last to the end of the day. If you want to be French-Girl worthy, you gotta cultivate Fragrance Vigilance. Perfume Priority. Spray and Stay.

So what’s on my dressing table? I have a number of perfumes that I wear from time to time, but right now I have three go-to’s that I wear most often to “Channel” my inner French Girl.   Chanel No 5 Eau Premier;  Hermes un Jardin en Mediterranee; and  Hypnotic Poison by Christian Dior. 

Learn to channel your inner French Girl to start your day sweetly. Find a perfume that you love, that makes you happy, that uplifts your spirits, then spray well and often.  That way, wherever you go, there you smell. 

QUESTION: WHAT’S ONE THING YOU DO THAT CHANNELS YOUR INNER FRENCH GIRL? I’D LOVE TO KNOW! PLEASE TELL US BELOW!

XOXOXOXX,

Princess Diane Von Brainisfried

“LIVE YOUR ROYALLY HAPPY LIFE!™”

 

 

 

 

 

Seven Little Known Secrets For Coping With Fear, Anxiety, & Worry

Dear Royal Friends,

Life has a way of scaring the living crap out of us. Sometimes it’s self-inflicted, like when we ruminate in the Trifecta of Troublesome Thoughts (Fear, Worry & Anxiety).  Sometimes we blow up a small problem bigger than Puff The Magic Dragon — the old ‘Mountains out of Molehills thing. Sometimes the goblins are totally real…like the passionate frog you kissed (etc.) and thought was Prince Charming, turned out to be a run-of-the-pond “horny” toad. Literally. 

"When Prince Charming turns out to be Pond Scum.'

“When Prince Charming turns out to be Pond Scum.’

I may be a princess pundit of positivity, but I’m not immune from getting into a tizzy by life’s slings and arrows.  But I do have a rather large bag of tricks up my princess puffy sleeves to deal with them.  I’ve accumulated an arsenal of handy dandy worry circuit breakers which I keep readily available in my “Coping” Cabana drawer located on the left side of my brain.  In the bag are thoughts and exercises that calm my mind when it’s twirling around, as the Queen Mum says, “like a fart in beet soup.”  Or maybe someone’s bubbe said that. 

Here are seven excellent coping tricks I use that are quite unusual, but incredibly effective:

1.  Remember you have to learn how to comfort yourself, then visualize being in two big hands full of light. – Fanny Trueherz;

2. Say to yourself, “Let go, be loving, and let the divine swirl move you.”  – Princess Diane Von Brainsfried;

3. Calming breath exercise: “Smell the flowers, blow out the candles.”  Technique: Breathe in slowly through your nose on “smell the flowers,” breathe out more quickly through your mouth on “blow out the candles.”   – Intensive Care Unit at Robert Wood Johnson University Hospital in New Brunswick, NJ;

4. Say to yourself, “Leave the thinking to the horses; they’ve got bigger heads”  – Fanny Trueherz;

5. Become like a chiropractor of your brain and make an attitude adjustment – Princess Diane Von Brainisfried

6.  Say to yourself, “It’s all mind over matter. I don’t mind, and it don’t matter.” – my dad, Dr. Irving Young;

7. LAUGH. Find some funny videos on Youtube or Facebook, or watch a funny movie.  “The World is full of horrible things that will eventually get you and everything you care about. Laughter is a universal way to lift your head up and say: ‘Not today, you bastards!'” – Anthony Jeselnik  

I invite you to get yourself a big ole’ Bag o’ Coping Tricks too. Steal these from me with my blessing.  Store your bag wherever you like, but keep it handy dandy. And yes, we have to learn how to comfort ourselves, but that doesn’t mean we can’t get a little help from our royal friends.  I’m here for you.  

Bisous et tra la la,

XOXOXOXO,

Princess Diane Von Brainisfried 

“LIVE YOUR ROYALLY HAPPY LIFE!”

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One princess’s pudding is another’s poison

Dear Royal Friends~

You’ve undoubtedly heard the expression,  “one man’s poison is another man’s pudding.”  

"You don't like puddin'? Then more for me!"

“You don’t like puddin’? Then more for me!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

For example, staying on a “roll” with the food theme, I am not a big fan of pig roasts.  It pains me to see these sad-eyed  little critters crammed all whole and real on a serving platter, their last Wil(bur) and testament being a parsley-plattered  laurel, a sad irony considering it’s certainly not the pig’s victory.  And, good lord, what they do to that poor apple!

Pig roasts, as you might have guessed, are my poison. But some princesses love pig roasts. To them,  it’s their pudding.

And so I was reminded of this pudding/poison axiom as I was strolling through New York City’s Central Park just the other day, when  grey, threatening skies loomed sooner than predicted.  The clouds were not supposed to open up into wetness until evening. But you know what they say, “Man plans, G-d laughs”  and the skies had another idea.  Almost without warning, we in the park got dumped on by a torrent that soon soaked our clothes and packages, and made our sneakers and jellies squeak.  

Many scurried and many scowled, and most did both, harassed by this lapse in weatherman judgement.   I ran under the nearest broad-limbed tree, but the droplets were like heat seeking missiles that found their way through the feathery leaves.   I spied  a table umbrella at a vacant table by a little park cafe and made a bee-line for better cover.

As I stood waiting out the downpour,  feeling slightly grumbly,  I saw a sight that shifted my perception of the unexpected storm.  

You see, running down the hill outside the little park cafe was a young man pushing a baby carriage  in the pouring rain.  He was shouting  “wheeeeeee” “wheeeeee” at the top of his lungs,  and his rain-streaked face sported a smile so brilliant, it was a near match for the absent sun.   Inside the carriage was a golden-haired angel, maybe two or three years old, soaked curls matted against her head,  head tilted up to the sky to receive this gift, giggling and laughing in wild abandon.  Both of her chubby little  arms were outstretched high into the air in order to grasp the raindrops as they whizzed by her in the carriage.

  I will never forget the expression on that little girl’s face. If joy had a face, she was IT.

In that moment I realized that this downpour, this “poison” that was responsible for so many scowls on so many faces, was quintessential pudding to this little girl!  Forget pudding; this was an Eiffel tower-sized  ice cream sundae with rainbow shhhprinkels!  This was  a giant stuffed teddy bear won at a Six Flags roulette wheel.  This was an “I bought you a puppy” even though mommy said “no.”

Suddenly, at the sight of this little cherub’s amazingly happy face, I broke into a Cheshire Cat grin. Her exuberant squeals of delight tickled me princess pink, and what was a moment ago my poison, became instantly my pudding. (Not to be confused with instant pudding.) Right then and there I made a vow  to remember the expression on that little girl’s face forever. To remember the sound of her unfettered and spontaneous glee.  To remember her father’s indulgently playful “wheeeeeee” “wheeeee” all the way home. I shall use these as my shield against the onslaughts of daily little poisons.

And when they assault me, and they will, I will  remember this little girl and her father, and then this little princess will go “wheeee” “wheeee” all the way home to the palace. 

TTFN, P! (Ta Ta For Now, Princess)  

hearts-673345_640 pixabay

 

 

PRINCESS DIANE VON BRAINISFRIED

“Live Your Royally Happy Life!™”

 

 

 

 

 

 

Unveiling my princess food truck prototype!

Dear Princess,

I recently hopped into the city for some business meetings in my kingdom.  Lunchtime came around and my colleagues and I spilled outside to grab some grub.   My mind was on some salad or such in a little French bistro (of course) around the corner, when my eye caught sight of a gaggle of fabulous food trucks lined up along the street, gleaming in the midday sun. One after the other, these proud, square squatters parked in the fab food lane.  From taco and tortillas, to pitas and their pockets, to brews and stews, the “stand up” chefs in their upscale chuck wagons were energetically serving an exciting diversity of delectables to eager consumers waiting in long ques. Hmmmm….is that a fajita sizzling, or the smell of a successfully sizzling enterprise?!

It got me to thinkin’ — wouldn’t it be fun to add a princess food truck empire to my many indulgent projects? Yeppers it t’wood.  But what would a princess food truck even look like?

I thought up some ideas and consulted my experts, then combed the world looking for a prototype so I could retrofit it to my exact specs!  Here it is!  Whaddaya think?

pumpkin-17662_1920

 

 

I’m so excited, because I got a two thumbs up from  the great chef “Gourd-on” Ramsey. 

What would your princess food truck look like?

Bisous et tralala,

XOXOXOXOX PRINCESS DIANE VON BRAINISFRIED

 

 

 

Is that funny money in your wallet?

Dear Royal Friends, 

It has come to the attention of the keepers of my royal treasure trove, that some of the money in our kingdom might be funny.  Was there an interloper in our kingdom who was laundering more than dirty knickers? How did this infection infuse our treasury?

I was terribly upset at first, because I have heard very bad things about funny money, although I don’t really know what they are. Anything funny seems like a good thing to me. And that’s when I had an epiphany.

We here in the kingdom are always trying to look at the bright side. If anyone can find a way to make lemon-cello out of lemons, we can.  So I thought, funny is a good thing. Stuff that’s funny makes you laugh, puts a smile on your face, lifts your spirits. So if  funny is a good thing, why can’t we look at funny money in a way that is a good thing too?  And we can!  You see, finally, for the first time ever, only in our kingdom, if and when our money is funny…money can buy you happiness.

buy-1299519_1280

And that’s a pretty big bang for the buck.                        

Bisous et tra la la,

Princess Diane Von Brainisfried                                              

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9 NECESSITIES FOR A ROYAL PRINCESS LIFE – HOT NEW LIST!

Dear Royal Friends, 

If you’re a newbie princess like I am, it’s a little hard to get up to snuff.  I’ve had to do a lot of catching up in a short time, not only to fulfill my royal duties, but also to learn to live life the way a royal princess oughta. One of my self-appointed duties is to help other newbie princesses learn the (purple velvet) ropes of princess life.  In order to do that, I make lists of this stuff. 

Here’s my latest list. It’s not organized in any particular order, because neither is my brain. 

1. A comprehensive guide to the most elegant and princess-worthy public pit stops in your kingdom — in case you need that throne away from home on your royal tours.

waldorf-MG_3281

The above is the glamorous entrance to New York City’s Waldorf Astoria’s ladies’ inner sanctum on the main floor.   

2. An auditorium-sized walk-in closet for your tiara collection.

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Make sure it has theater-quality lighting.   

3. A signature perfume created by a famous “nose” just for you, with the perfect blend of evocative notes to reflect your sweetness and your refinement, as well as your bold essence. Make sure there’s not even a hint of mousiness. 

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4. An hat that on a non-royal would look absolutely ridiculous…

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 …but on a royal just looks kinda ridiculous. 

5. A family “CREST” befitting your present royal status.

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Absolutely essential for your front doormat, and by jove it looks swell on cocktail napkins.  

6. A Frenchie Locator App for your phone.

filippo-991912_1920Helpful to locate these cute little royal princess mascots anytime, anywhere, so you can pet them. 

7. Proper rain boots for those more formal occasions. 

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 Sloshing about in muddy puddles with $2,000 pink peau de soi shoes on your tootsies is a total buzz kill. Trust me.

8. A crash course dedicated to international royal-speak.  

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A princess needs to be able to purr in a multitude of languages such phrases as, “I love your tie. Is that Hermes?”  Or, “My what an adorable infant. Do you do Baby Einstein?”  Or in the hotter realms, “Yikes! Are those mosquitoes or birds?”  It’s a “tall” order, but you’ll be glad you did.

9.  Claim a signature expensive French wine as your favorite and make sure to order it frequently. So when the waiter (inevitably) brings you freebies, he won’t “monkey around” with the cheap stuff. And you won’t have to water the nearest plant!

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What’s on your princess necessity list?  I’d love your comments!

TTFN,P!  (Ta ta for now, princess!)

XOXOXOXOX PRINCESS DIANE VON BRAINISFRIED

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SPRING RENEWAL – FINDING THE POSITIVE WHEN LIFE BRINGS POOP

Dear Royal Friends,

A little bunny told me that spring is hare, I mean here!  Time for recalibratin’, re-evalutatin’, and re-invigoratin’ your outlook on life. Time to push upwards with a new view. Maybe life ain’t that bad. Maybe there’s something wonderful and promising in your life that doesn’t look so great right now.  Listen, if the tulips and daffodils can do it, so can you! They slept as bulbs all winter long, cozy and warm underground.  Then spring came along, they peeped up from the ground, and what did they find? They’re surrounded by fertilizing poop that smells so bad, it’s a wonder they don’t dive back into the earth and grow upside down! 

But they knew how to put a good spin on the stink. They knew their  situation may be hard to take right now, but it’s gonna turn them into one glorious bouquet!

https://pixabay.com/en/woman-flowers-female-sitting-768702/

https://pixabay.com/en/woman-flowers-female-sitting-768702/

 

 

 The ability to find what’s good lurking in what seems bad is one of the biggest keys to a happy life.  You know that joke about the little boy who found poop in the living room under the Christmas tree, and instead of crying, he happily exclaimed, “I know there’s a pony here somewhere!” The trick in life is to try to find that darn pony lurking in every smelly pile.

Very often, it’s these challenges and limitations in our lives that hold something wonderful, if we just remember to look for it.  A perfect example of this is Dr. Seuss. He wrote one of his most famous books, “Green Eggs and Ham,” on a bet he couldn’t write a book with fifty or fewer words. We all know how that turned out.  He got to say, “Here’s egg on your face.”

I remember when I was in college and I had a  painful infection in my tooth and had to rush to the University clinic for an emergency root canal. The tooth then needed a crown. (Perfect for a princess, aye?) Well the little bugger didn’t fit perfectly, and little bits of dinner liked to hang out there.  I thought at the time, “Well this sucks. Food is getting caught in my tooth and I have to floss it out every night.  What a pain!”  But I figured as long as I was flossing the one tooth, I might as well floss them all. And the habit of flossing was born.  Voila. Something good from something bad.

And indeed, like the habit of flossing, learning to find the good in the bad is also a habit, and you would benefit greatly from cultivating it, even in the lighter challenges of your life.  Say you bemoan the fact that you can only afford one really good Little Black Dress. That might feel like a lack.  But with only one LBD, you might find the benefit of working your creativity like nobody’s biz.  One little black dress might be a catalyst to exploring  different ways to express yourself.  A big starburst pin on the shoulder one evening,  a vivid scarf flowing a la Isadora Duncan another,  bangles and baubles on another occasion, red heels on another, a bold statement necklace on another. Necessity is the mother of invention…in the end you learn something wonderful about yourself. You never knew you were such a mother!

Try looking at life from a benefits point of view, even in the hard times. The moment you take a problem and turn it on its head to find the blessing, life gets a whole lot easier, and you get a whole lot happier.

 HAPPY SPRING!  FIND THE BLESSINGS!

hearts-673345_640 pixabay

 

PRINCESS DIANE VON BRAINSIFRIED

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Mind blowing question to live your big bold princess-worthy life!

Dear Royal Friends,

If you are a royal friend of mine, which you are if you’re reading this, you are someone who wants to live a big, bold princess-worthy life. But sometimes it’s really hard to know what your big, bold, princess-worth life is.  And sometimes even if you do know, you’ve either missed the boat, or you never had a snowball’s chance in Hades from achieving it.  And sometimes it’s just too mind-boggling to think about it. Because it’s scary. Maybe you’ll end up looking down a long empty hallway of locked doors, and everybody’s gone home.  

Say you dreamed of becoming an internationally famous NBA basketball star, but there’s one “tiny” problem.  You’re five foot one in fishnet stockings.  red-light-299710_1920

Plus, they don’t have a girl’s locker room.  Plus, you’ve started getting magazines from AARP. You smirk at yourself and your dim, lofty dreams, and in your best smirk voice, you smirk, “You haven’t missed the boat — you’ve missed the ark. Have a nice life, suck-ah! Oh, and by the way, I’ll smirk if I want to.” 

Sometimes, however, it’s not our height, age or sex that’s getting in the way of our big, bold, princess-worthy life.  Sometimes it’s us.  Because we refuse to recalibrate our original dreams to make them fit our authentic, valuable, worthy life that we actually live now that we’ve carved out with people whom we love and who love us.  Tradable for nothing. Because it’s worth everything.  

Guess what? Good news! There’s an alternative dream coming to you that fits your authentic life. Maybe it’s not a perfect dream, but it’s pretay, pratay good.  Entertain this possibility: If you let yourself flow where this new dream takes you, you might find you get some place you never even old-dreamed…and that your life looks better and it’s more meaningful than it would have been had you pursued your original dream!  

So what now?  What happens if we just haven’t ventured out past our Comfort Zone, because we haven’t dared to put thought rays in that direction for a very long time. My royal friends.  I’m here to tell you, don’t be afraid.  There’s a safe place somewhere between Out-On-A-Limb-Throwing-It-All-Away  v. Don’t-Do-A-Darn-Thing-About-An-Old-Dream.

Here’s a little trick I picked up from the Royal House of Haplessburger.  Which is not, by the way, related to a royally hapless burger, which, by the way, as a vegan, I don’t “relish” the thought.  Ask yourself:

WHAT WOULD YOU DO WITH YOUR LIFE IF YOU KNEW YOU COULD NOT FAIL?

This question is worth more than at least one big diamond in my tiara and a small sapphire. Maybe throw in a big fat emerald for good luck. This question will radically bust through the gray matter membrane in your tiara-topped skull to get it jiggling in the right direction.  Once you answer the question, don’t YOU be the one to stand in your way. Don’t YOU be your own worst frenemy.  

You see, there is no failing.  There is just doing. Just adventure. Just a journey. Just a big fat learning curve.  Just a rich and fabulous life on new and endearing and energized terms. You see, half way between wanting to be an NBA star and sitting on the palace stoop with a bag of Veuve Cliquot and a tin pan (hey, it’s a living), there’s something out there for you that you will still LOVE to do, and feel fulfillment in doing, if you would just slap some street cred in the direction of your inner goddess and less credence to your inner critic.  It’s a new look. Only on the inside.  

Here’s the key to the palace: Don’t trap yourself into thinking you have to change jobs, leave your family, quit your life, fill in the blanks.  There’s  a way to pursue your old dream in some form if you will just apply some creative thinking.  Here’s a bonus key to the palace: Throw away your all or nothing mentality.  That is one of the biggest moat traps you can fall into.  There are some real crocodiles waiting there to thwart your big, bold, princess-worthy life.

So you. You with the fishnets and the hearing aids. Yeah you. Go ahead. Organize a basketball team in your area.  Maybe it becomes recognized state wide and beyond. You start raising some serious funds for a really BIG cause.  You blog about it. Others blog about it.  I’m already hearing some serious buzz…ET calls you. Hooray! You’re a Princess Hero Basketball Super Star!  You’ve even got your own private locker room!

You can do it my royal friends….I bid you good luck!  Get out there and live your big, bold princess-worthy lives!

bisous et tra la la,

 

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Princess Diane Von Brainisfried

 

10 SECRETS OF THE HAPPIEST PEOPLE – A LAUNDRY LIST FOR YOUR NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION!

Dear Royal Friends,  

With all my heart I wish you abundant happiness for a fab-YOU-licious New Year.   And I’m not just blowing smoke up your assignment!   I’ve got some royally fantastic, researched-backed information to help make my wish for you come true.  YES, THAT’S RIGHT, did you know there’s a laundry list out there that’s not for wash day, but for a happier life?  I know that may sound like a stretch…using the words “laundry” and “happier life” in the same sentence, that is. 

Photo Credit: Tiago Zaniratti via Compfight cc

Photo Credit: Tiago Zaniratti via Compfight cc

As for the idea that royally happy people might share some common attributes, they absolutely do.  

Sonia Lyubomirsky, in  The How of Happiness, has researched  and put together a list of ten things the happiest people do.  I bet you’re already doing some of them!  If you are, or even if you’re not, everyone can do a little something to up their happiness factor.  Why not take a clue from the experts at happiness and make it  part of your New Year’s resolution to UP YOURS! 

How to take action to boost your happiness quotient?  Do more of what’s tried and true on this laundry list.  If you do, be prepared to wash away some  frowns and clean up some smiles.

LAUNDRY LIST OF WHAT THE HAPPIEST PEOPLE DO. 

– Devote time to relationships

– Express gratitude and offer help to those who need it

– Practice optimism

– Cope effectively with difficult experiences and emotions

– Get regular exercise

– Savor life’s pleasures AND commit deeply to the pursuit of life-long          goals

Happy New Year’s Resolution-ing!  

SEE YOU NEXT YEAR!

hearts-673345_640 pixabay

 

 

PRINCES DIANE VON BRAINISFRIED

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